When I was younger I imagined adulthood would be a cake made of two ingredients; one part raucous freedom without the limitations of childhood, and one part mantle of all the responsibilities which come with age. What I didn’t imagine is just how easy it is to be...well, tired.
Don’t get me wrong, life is exceptionally full of goodness right now for me. But there is this ever-present undercurrent which would be easy to fall into on any given day, a natural pull of the heavy elements of the world around me threatening to bring me down to a dark place. It’s not just one individual thing either, but a stream of challenges, concerns, frustrations, pessimistic feelings, negative voices, difficult news, broken dreams, outright lies, harsh realities...and a countless number of other forces pulling at my heartstrings.
It’s the red alert text flashing at the bottom of a news channel. Fears about money and scarcity. Questions about where to go next in life. Anger over choices those around me make. The declining environment my children will have to grow up in. Another story of tragedy in my social circle. You get what I mean?
Maybe you feel some of this too. A weight at a deep level which can build up over time.
Adulthood comes with the burden of holding an awareness of all these things and learning to become strong enough to weather life through them, and if done well, to thrive and cultivate joy in spite of whatever comes.
At the same time, every once in a while my soul just wants to have a spa day. I’ve never actually had a real spa day now that I think about it. But from what I know of them, they sound quite nice - a practical way to restore the body and give rest to the mind. Here’s your billion dollar idea...open a chain of luxury soul spas around the world. You’re welcome.
I feel this mostly because I can’t take a break from being an adult and go back to the carefree innocence and ignorance of being a child. Not really. I can choose childish things anytime I please, like letting my mail pile up in a corner or eating Hot Pockets every night instead of cooking something healthy, but I can’t really escape the eventualities of adulthood any more than I can escape death and taxes.
Sometimes the soul needs to take a break from the heaviness and tension just beneath the surface. But how does a person do that?
Here are a few ideas which might help if you need to take a spa day for the soul sometime soon:
Find rest in something good. This is very different than merely finding rest. While having rest is key to living well, we often are resting away from something. Away from work. Away from family. Away from the normal hustle and grind life places in front of us. Resting in something good requires us to lean into something and find restoration there.
For the Christian, the obvious answer is to lean into resting in God and the comfort and strength offered. Other ways to engage this idea at a less spiritual level are to find practical resources in your life to press into depending on what gives lightness in your life. Perhaps playing with dogs up for adoption for an afternoon, or going to a live, low-key concert of music which speaks to you in a powerful way. There are a ton of options to do this, but finding something which doesn’t require a lot of effort or planning but still offers deep soul rest is crucial. Resting in something good doesn’t necessarily need to be an activity either, it can be as simple as sitting in nature and soaking up the sounds and sights around you.
Do something you are passionate about. The soul is the engine of passion. It’s what drives the deepest, most meaningful choices we make in every area of our lives. Want to find a measure of recovery? Let passion be your guide. Do something which brings out the passionate parts of you. The key here is to not pick something which will drain a lot of yourself to do, but rather pick a thing you love and creates a spark in you. Are you a diehard fan of BBQ? Take a morning off with a good book and wait in line at Franklin’s. Get excited by seeing people liberated? Volunteer with a migrant facility. Do your kicks come from creating art? Stop by the store and splurge on something you’ve always wanted and make something new! Passion restores the deep places within us and helps us be the best version of ourselves, if we let it out.
Invest in someone else. We are made for each other. And, we are social creatures. When our inner demons or outward turmoils disrupt our soul it’s important to remember that not only are we not on this journey alone, but that we can make substantial change in other’s lives. People, just like us, who may need a spa day for the soul just as much. Take a day to be generous to strangers, or practice showing extreme gratitude to everyone you meet. Giving time and energy to make someone else’s life brighter and fuller replenishes your soul just as much as it does theirs. This isn’t a one way street; the more you are willing to give of yourself in healthy ways the more your soul is open to receiving renewal.
Life is a never-ending battle against entropy. We are in every moment pushing back against the decay beyond the walls of Eden. And some days, we need to take time for soul-care so we can step into whatever is next as adults with the strength we need to flourish.
So my hope for you this week is that you are able to find cucumber eye patches and mud baths for your soul, wherever you are today.